Right now I’m feeling good. The sun is shining. I had energy and time for a walk and a long asana and meditation practice this morning. Now I’m feeling grateful that what I thought was the beginning of a cold has cleared out, and I’m breathing freely.
The past few days have been different. The feelings in this body have been heavy yet brittle, and contracted. I’ve made space for this; yes, I have. I’ve also been bringing the list of practices that I know encourage change: walks, baths, morning asana, longer time for meditation, restorative poses, and of course soup. When I feel crappy, I want to feel better. Who doesn’t?
It’s during a week of stormy body sensations that the practice of non-judging clarifies for me, in its challenge and its value. I practice seeing the inevitable thoughts about how I “should” or should not be feeling. I call into question the old stories that bubble up, about how I am “always” this way or that way. Curiosity, kindness and acceptance — then maybe there’s a moment of grace when I realize that this is how it is now. And not how it will always be.
How may we better support ourselves and each other in difficult times? How do we allow the space for darkness, fear, and illness, while remembering to hold beacons that signal the shores of courage and equanimity?
Practices of embodied presence vividly light up those beacons, pointing us along a constant yet constantly changing way. Shaped by impermanence and compassion.