Kinder

The degree to which I can welcome all parts of myself
mirrors the degree to which I can extend
true welcome and kindness to others.

With gratitude, gratitude, and more gratitude for what sees me through the many times when I forget to go gently. When I get irritated with imperfection, tense everything up, and race against myself. Like a cat rubbing its own fur the wrong way…. And then after so much struggle and static electricity, one morning after finding my spine in yoga I wake up feeling better. This shifts softly or suddenly, reconnecting and finding the through line. Simply from a movement, or maybe a connecting touch, some wise or loving words, a good meal, a strong song.

Here’s lyrics from “Kinder,” by Alyx Autuori of Copperwimmin, which I sing often with the Threshold Choir. I listen to this song at least once and usually twice a week — sometimes more, if I need it — and enough by now that I think the neighbors could be tired of hearing me sing it at the top of my lungs. (One of these days I’ll figure out how to link sound files to this blog, so you can hear me sing it at the top of my lungs too.) You could download it online, if you want to hear its power:

I’ve decided to be happy, 
I’ve decided to be glad.
I’ve decided to be grateful for all I ever had.
I’ve decided to let go of all this pain tonight.
I’ve decided to let go of all these demons inside.

I know I am blessed.
I know all I ever wanted was this.
I know I don’t need more.
I’ve got what I came for.

I’ve decided to be open to that little voice inside,
Telling me I’m beautiful, it’s okay to be alive.
I’ve decided to be kinder to myself when I feel sad.
I’ve decided to be grateful for all I ever had.

I know I am blessed.
I know all I ever wanted was this.
I know I don’t need more.
I’ve got what I came for.

One comment

  1. Joshua Seaman says:

    I love this song and am feeling particularly touched and empowered by its lyrics right now. I had no idea who actually sang it, and your site was the only one on the internet I could find showing them. Thank you for leading me to Copperwimmin 🙂

    Blessings,
    Joshua

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